One of the most recurring phrases I hear in my coaching from clients is the phrase, “What’s wrong with me?”
Surely, if we can’t stick to our goals and commit already, then there must be something wrong with us.
Think again, my friends.
When you think, “What’s wrong with me?” you are implying that you’re broken. Needing to be fixed, needing help, needing something other than you to get to your goals
So I’ll let you in on a little secret: there’s nothing wrong with you. And all the answers are inside of you already. And I will keep guiding you there.
But no, what’s wrong with anything is actually just our environment. Plain and simple.
You have been thrust into a world of immediate satisfaction and resources GALORE with a brain that’s not prepared to know how to handle that.
Our brains are wired to think “more calories, eat more, or we’ll die” in a world where calories are EVERYWHERE.
Last time I checked, calories were NOT SCARCE. :P
No, it’s not you.
It’s the rest of the world around you.
It’s literally set up to make you crave. To make you fail. To make you addicted.
So then you say, “Ok, so we’re in a tough place, I get it…I KNOW THAT. How will I ever succeed? How will I ever stand up to my surroundings?”
The next feeling is usually hopelessness, that you’ll just never get this right, because the world is designed to make you quit.
But let’s talk about what the solution is. It ain’t easy, but it’s worth it.
The solution is 3-fold, and each part is equally as important:
Eat the right, high-nutrient/calorie foods as much as possible
Get your environment set up for success as much as possible
Work on the thoughts that occur in your mind
You must do all 3 of these things, if you have any hope of succeeding. It’s a long game. A really long game. But I can assure you, it is possible for all of us, and it does work.
One day, after you’ve learned to do those three things enough, your addictions actually heal. You actually become a much-less-addicted person who can sustain your goal weight with relative ease.
But at the same time, one thing you’ve gotta stop doing is telling yourself it’s going to get easier one day.
Sounds counter-intuitive, right? On the one hand, I said it was gonna get easier, but on the other hand, I said stop thinking it will get easier.
The issue lies in letting your guard down and thinking it’s all just supposed to come to you at some point. That you don’t have to work for things to get easier.
Thinking that is likely to trip you up ALL the time. Because in those moments where we just don’t feel our best, we get caught up in “Oh it’s too hard, it’s not working, it’s not easy yet, I’ll just give up” mode and then you’ve gotta get back on track after that feeling wears off.
Keep in mind that you will go through half good times, half bad times, and that cycle never ends.
Not as long as you’re human, anyway.
Some weeks, you’re gonna feel great and it’ll be easy. Some weeks, not so much.
Some days, you’re gonna feel great and it’ll be easy. Some days, not so much.
Some minutes, you’re gonna feel great and it’ll be easy. Some minutes, not so much.
Keeping this in mind and anticipating the lows goes a LONG way towards getting through them. Then it’s all about acknowledging it’s hard, getting used to and accepting that being uncomfortable is key, and then just riding the waves. If you can ride the waves of craving, of low emotion, of difficulty…that’s the key.
So, to recap:
Is it going to be easy? No.
Is there anything wrong with you? No.
Can you do this? Abso-effing-lutely.
You’ve got the answers within your power. Now it just comes down to keeping on with your practice. Just keep going.